Thursday, December 16, 2010

Yumsy in My Tumsy

Better late than never, right? Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday ever, end of story. I love it because it's secular, it doesn't involve presents, and it involves tons of food and alcohol. It is a uniquely North American holiday, celebrated only in Canada and the United States. Contrary to all the Claymation presentations you saw as a child, it was actually a tradition brought over from England. One that the English no longer even think about. So, yes, it's ours now, and ours alone. Well, ours with Canada.

So, to answer the comment of one lone reader, Thanksgiving wasn't actually that hard for me. It was time-consuming, but not hard.

I made all of the sides the night before. I think, of the sides, the dressing was the most difficult, simply because of all the sauteeing involved. The broccoli casserole was annoying, really. I love cheese and everything that it brings to a dish, but having to work with it is a bear. Cheese doesn't give easily, and you really need to dig in to make it melt and stir properly. And believe me when I say that six cups of rice is more than any normal human can handle.

I also really hate standing over a stove, which is why, in my everyday life, I make a lot of casseroles and meatloaves. So the apple reduction made me question my purpose in life. But it turned out to be my favorite part of my holiday meal.

I have to thank Fresh Direct for so many of my ingredients. In my neighborhood, pork tenderloin isn't a food and goes for $10.50 per half hour in a back alley. And brining is something you do to some dude who takes your parking spot.

I may be doing the same thing for New Year's Eve. Cooking, I mean. It will be much simpler than Thanksgiving, but my love of flavors and ingenuity will still be present.

Friday, November 26, 2010

My Favorite Holiday, People

I know I'm bitter and evil, but there's a gooey center to me. Please take in what I made for Thanksgiving. Yes, I made all of it.

1. Orange-Thyme Turkey
2. Cornbread Dressing
3. Broccoli-Rice Casserole
4. Spiced Yams
5. Homemade Cranberry Sauce
6. Pork Tenderloins with Apple Cider Reduction
7. Death by Chocolate Cookie













Friday, July 16, 2010

And the Award Goes To...

The Emmys are fast approaching. The celebration of my favorite medium. I know I've had some harsh words, and I stand by them. But, still, I am obligated by my passion for television -- and my membership in gaydom -- to watch the awards ceremony.

However, for quite some time, I've had a minor complaint. For at least the past decade or so, shows like "Ally McBeal" and "Desperate Housewives" have blurred the lines between genres. Not fully dramas, not fully comedies. "Dramedies," if you will. These hybrid shows are enjoyable and usually well-written and well-acted, which is why they keep getting nominated for Emmys.

And there's the problem: How do you classify these programs and their actors for the purposes of Emmy nominations?

Well, as it stands, they get shuffled under "comedy," but that doesn't really work. Take, for example, the DH ladies. Teri Hatcher makes sense as a comedic actress nominee because her role is primarily for laughs. An argument could even be made that the same goes for Felicity Huffman, but certainly not Marcia Cross. Cross's shining moments are in her dramatic scenes, and Huffman excels in both drama and comedy.

This year, I'm delighted to see so many of the "Glee" stars nominated, as well as the show itself. But the problem rises again, specifically with the two nominees for whom I am rooting the hardest (and who are least likely to win, if we're being honest). Chris Colfer and Mike O'Malley as Kurt Hummel and his father Burt. Both are amazing in their roles, and, of course, both have their comic moments which they milk for all they're worth. But what they truly deserve to be honored for are those heart-wrenching father/son moments. And it seems inadequate, at best, to judge them alongside true comic performances by the likes of Jon Hamm on "30 Rock," Neil Patrick Harris or the stars of "Modern Family".

The nominations of "United States of Tara" and "Nurse Jackie" and their cast members are likewise perplexing. Even more than "Glee," these shows tend towards the dramatic. One would be generous in defining them as "dark comedies."

These hybrids have had to do a dance to decide in which category to submit reels, and they seem to always define themselves as comedies. The cynical part of me wants to say that TPTB believe that comedy is an easier category to win. (The laden awards shelf over at "Desperate Housewives" HQ supports my cynicism.) Another part of me, however, says that they just don't know what else to do. Err on the side of caution and all that.

I have long proposed a separate category altogether. But no one listens to me, so...

Friday, May 21, 2010

The Kagan Question

From the moment I heard the words “50,” “single” and “no children,” I knew that Elena Kagan’s sexual orientation was going to become question. Maybe more annoying like a gnat than potentially painful or dangerous like a bee, but attention-grabbing all the same. Of course, I had the same reaction as I did when “Jewish” popped up on the news graphic: Do these things matter?

My final answer is “no.” Mind you, I’m not saying that a candidate’s personal life isn’t interesting or even, to a mild degree, important. When one enters politics, one all but invites the intimate probing. People are naturally curious (read: gossipy) and want to know these things, especially in a democracy in which people feel it’s their basic right to know. But even more so in an age where the culture is increasingly more apt to reveal private matters in an extraordinarily public fashion. In my opinion, however, the bottom line, is this: Unless it can be proven that any facet of a candidate’s personal life will cripple his or her ability to perform his or her duties, then the details thereof are irrelevant and nothing more than interesting pieces of a whole. In the case of Elena Kagan, that means, would being a lesbian cloud her objectivity?

For the record, according to Karen Tumulty of the “Washington Post” (May 14, 2010), the White House publicly stated that Kagan is, in fact, heterosexual. “False charges,” claimed spokesperson Ben LaBolt. (Ahem.)

End of discussion? Well, my mind is one that travels freely through the Land of What-If (thankfully, no citizenship papers are necessary to do so), and I can’t help wondering, “What if Kagan were an out lesbian? What then?” Is there really any question?

Monday, March 8, 2010

Oscar Night 2010 - III

Thanks, you guys, for reading.

I have so much to say. Not just that a woman finally won Best Director. But she won Best Director, Best Film and Best Ex-Spouse-Fuck-You!

Mo'Nique's win wasn't at all surprising. But it really said to me that comedians can do serious drama. And I know that's happened before. But the fact is that they always have to prove it. But the good ones who do it? They're the ones who actually DO it. She fucking did it. Her performance was beyond measure.

Gabourey Sidibe? That girl is too remarkable. I just hope she gets the right roles (and isn't typecast as "the sassy, fat girl") because she's too cute and sweet and fabulous. As the late, lamented Patrick Swayze would say, she can't be "put in a corner!"

I had such a great time watching. It helped my commentary to have my best friend Heather with me. I loved every minute.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

Oscar Night 2010 - Part II

The show, itself...

8:34 - Antonio Banderas in a full beard. He's apparently just given up.

8:37 - Where are Helen Mirren's boobs? She's always showing off the rack.

8:44 - Glad that Penelope Cruz hasn't been relegated to the Foreign Film ghetto... There's still Sophia Loren, though!

8:46 - Heather, on Woody Harrelson: "As he gets older, he's just going to get better... And that face? Is just going to get weirder."

9:01 - Shut it, Miley. If you can't deal, then go home.

9:13 - SJP is GNAWING HER GUM!!! Ugh!

9:17 - Molly Ringwald and Matthew Broderick? I feel like a kid again!

9:21 - John Hughes. Will there ever be anyone else who understands kids as well as he did?

9:34 - I love it when a gay man wins. "Isn't that like a man to not let the woman talk?" Isn't it like the old Jewish woman to run over someone's comment?

9:40 - So, apparently, Ben Stiller's only function, now, is to look like an ass at every awards show.

10:00 - Way to go, Mo! Bring it home, girl.

10:08 - Way to play the "near-death card," there, buddy.

10:09 - "Clothes whore"? Half-right.

10:12 - Charlize Theron's bodice looks like the result of unfortunate foreplay.

10:28 - Wouldn't it have made more sense to have had the stars of Paranormal Activity present the horror movie tribute?

10:29 - Zac Efron: Making me feel like a dirty old man since 2006.

10:30 - King/Queen of the Dead! Whoo!!!

10:41 - Brittany Murphy had a very tight lead. I was sure that Natasha Richardson would steal it, but Karl Malden took the win!

In all seriousness, though, I'm disappointed at the lack of such luminaries as Bea Arthur. But she was honored during the Emmys, so I can't complain, I guess. But watching that weird dance number and having lots of our recently passed friends not being shown just feels wrong.

11:01 - And Farrah Fawcett was left out of the Oscar In Memoriam montage. Once again, her death was upstaged by freaking Michal Jackson.

11:06 - Tyler Perry? You are super-hot, but... please be quiet.

11:18 - One of the Best Foreign Film winners was dressed like Wednesday Addams-gone-formal.

11:30 - Yes, Morgan Freeman is a giving actor. He gives it to his granddaugther.

11:45 - Heather: [Oprah's] wearing blue?
Peter: Everyone's wearing blue!
Heather: But all the black women are wearing the same color blue!

11:49 - Sandra Bullock: A Razzie and an Oscar in the same weekend. You rock that shit, girl!

11:52 - Best speech of the night. Sorry, Mo. Sandy took it.

11:55 - I just missed the announcement of the first female Best Director because I was running my mouth?

I love how humble she is. WHEN SHE JUST BEAT HER EX-HUSBAND!!!

11:59 - Heather: I thought they stopped saying, "And the winner is..."
Peter: Tom Hanks is old skool.

12:01: You know how I feel about men in uniform. Any uniform. And I don't just mean sexually.

Oscar Night 2010

I'm getting back in the blogging saddle and posting my running commentary on tonight's Oscars and red carpet, starting at 6pm eastern. Feel free to post your responses!

6:00 - Y'all ready?

Blah blah blah, Ryan. Just show me the dresses.

6:01 - FYI: Heather and I are doing the E! Red Carpet right now.

6:04 - What the hell's Zac Efron doing there? Not that I'm complaining. Ah... presenter.

6:09 - Not caring for Anna Kendrick's hair, but the dress is lovely. A little too close to her skintone, but still beautiful.

Mariska!!!

6:12 - Classy answer, Mo.

6:17 - Is blue the color of the evening? Mariah looks great, though -- and not insane!

6:19 - Am I supposed to care about this behind-the-scenes stuff?

6:27 - FYI: ABC has a live stream of the red carpet.

6:50 - A little late to the game with this one, but I'm so glad that Nicole Richie's settled down. She looks a bit dowdy tonight, though. A little too far on the opposite end of the spectrum.

7:00 - Sandra Bullock's pretty tipsy, I think. She had to hold on to the velvet rope stand.

7:03 - I'm watching Amanda Seyfried on both ABC.com and E! Aack! Brain freeze! Brain freeze!

7:50 - RDJ was on a little while ago. Normally, I hate when guys don't take off their sunglasses when being interviewed, but he's just so wonderful that I can let it go.

8:06 - "It's because she doesn't understand English." Oh, George Clooney! You rogue.

8:11 - Screw the Nelson Mandela celebration. I want to see Invictus because I want to see Matt Damon playing rugby. Hot.

8:22 - POSTURE, MILEY! POSTURE!

8:25 - Just to be "that guy," I think it's hilarious that Kathy Ireland, the supermodel, interviewed Gabourey Sidibe, the official Oscars big gal.